Comments on: Philippine Family Matters

By: Philly

Philly — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 08:53:34 +0000

Thanks for the kind words, Joe. Interesting your comments about Ireland. My maternal grandparents were from Scitland and big families and close families were the rule when Iwas growing up … back before the electric light My mom had alist of over 200 cousins at one time (grandmother and grandfather were from familes if 12 children, so the list of cousins mounted rapidly).

I have no idea how close any of them are today, since I myself have been out of touch for years. I often say one of the things I like a lot about the Philippines is that many things remind me of my youth back in the US … relationships and attitudes toward family that seem gone forever … perhaps it will go that way in the Philippines too, I don’t know, but at least I’ve had my chance to expereince it one more time, and I enjoy it.

Many comment on how the payback equation often fails … it’s true. But to me it is not the point. If my niece helps someone out later, so much the better, but my payback is the look on her face when she comes in the door from school today. Tomorrow will take care of itself, good or bad, it always does after all.

By: Philly

Philly — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 08:41:35 +0000

Yep, it’s a good feeling. Gives me something to do aside from sitting around and getting fatter, at least.

By: joe

joe — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 19:23:03 +0000

Superb piece and so true. I am a middle aged man who has lived most of his life here in NYC but I was born and raised in a small town in Ireland. I would tell you Dave that until I married my wife (Mia) I had no real concept of what family can really mean.

I do understand that many many years ago the same strong family ties existed in Ireland but they have long disappeared.

I chuckled when I read the ‘ paying foward ‘ business and of course I recognised it straight away; and it surely works. Mind you ,some recipients of the aid screw up but then again we are all human.

By: Mindanao Bob

Mindanao Bob — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 01:29:02 +0000

Hi Mita – Wow, thank you. Your words rang so true for me. I am very happy with my life here. We all have problems, no matter where we are, but overall, I have really found happiness living here, and with the people in my life.

We enjoyed having you and Dave to the house! Can’t wait to see you again!
.-= Mindanao Bob´s last blog ..Chatting in Bisaya =-.

By: Chas

Chas — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 23:53:38 +0000

Hi Dave,
Great article,looks like you have a busy house there now,glad you are enjoying it.
Your story shows clearly the close knit family bond in PI.
My better half (2nd youngest) with a little help from myself are helping the youngest,now in her final MBA year.It kind of gets passed down the sibling line.

regards Chas.

By: Philippine financial matters | Live In The Philippines

Philippine financial matters | Live In The Philippines — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 21:36:55 +0000

[...] the weekend, I read an interesting article from Dave Starr on his site entitled “Philippine Family Matters.” I was so happy that I decided to take the time to read the article because of several [...]

By: Mita

Mita — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 01:03:07 +0000

Honey,

Differences? Mano po….kisses and hugs. I doubt you were ever called “my darling boy” or “honey” by any other kids before…

By: Mita

Mita — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 00:57:05 +0000

Bob, I haven’t thanked you and Feyma for taking us around Davao and inviting us into your lovely home. Thank you, sincerely from our family to yours.

Remember that night at your home when Gigi’s boys and your kids and nieces were happily running all over the place at close to midnight – as if they had the coffee tasting session and not the adults? I distinctly remember you and Dave standing outside your front door after our ciggie break and couldn’t help but notice how happy you two Americans looked – so far away from home but so “at home” with your extended families. I didn’t say anything then but I knew you both found a secret to a happier life – surrounding yourselves with family members you love and who love you doubly back..

By: Philly

Philly — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 07:40:33 +0000

You’re welcome Robert, you know I am an inveterate tinkerer, always flipping switches here and there just to see how things work … used to make people nervous when I worked in missile launch centers, though, I have no idea why

I just happened upon that ‘pay forward’ idea as I was getting ready to write the article, and I was only writing the article becuase I wanted to use that picture Mita took, it hust made me happy

I did think of several parallels between our two famiy situations as I was writing. I also realize there are some folks who have had much worse, sometimes truly bad family situations here, and I’m sorry it worked out that way for them, indeed, but for me it truly has been a blessing.

By: Mindanao Bob

Mindanao Bob — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 07:17:41 +0000

I love the article, Dave. It mirrors my own life in so many ways! In fact, I have already made a note, and I will be doing my own article in connection with this… and linking to you, of course (my way of paying it forward….). Something struck me when I was reading your article, which might put a little twist on your thinking… it did put a twist on mine!

Thanks for flicking a little switch in my mind.
.-= Mindanao Bob´s last blog ..Chatting in Bisaya =-.