Here is yet another case that tugs at my heartstrings. It came in as a comment, but this lady asks way too many important things to have them buried in the comments section, so I have decided to make a full article out of this and offer what advice I can.
I am not a lawyer and what follows is my personal opinion only. Please do not take it as legal advice. If you are sick, you need a doctor, if you are in a legal bind you need an attorney. Act accordingly.
Also, this article my well draw some comments. great, that is why I am posting it. But please make sure you understand this lady is human, as we all are, and be kind and non-pejorative with any comments. Like most of us out here in the real world, she’s dancing as fast as she can.
… hello Dave, i have a lots of question being bother about my situation witch no one could say or knows what to do. please help me about your knowledge about my situation.. I am a Philippine, my husband is a Korean and we are getting marriage in the Phil’s. and now here i am at his place in south Korea.. as i stay in his place i found out his bad attitude he always getting angry which i don’t know the reason why? its a long long story that i suffered in his hands…
Okay, here’s what I gather so far. You are a Philippine citizen, married in the Philippine, to a Korean national correct?
i write here in shortly..which i found out that i am pregnant (3mos.) he always drunk everyday that makes me realized that,what will happen if my baby getting bigger. as he is always fighting me. then i could say that if he’s not a good husband nor he’s not a good father too. One day as he came from house he is drunk and he angry again without no reason then he slap my stomach( baby) and kicking me many times that’s why i escape from him.. because it makes me realized that if i stayed longer I’m afraid he would accidentally kill my baby. Now, i am here in my friends house my husband doesn’t know where i am now. and i am working at morning so that i could raise up my baby even if I’m a single mom.
Now I take it that you are still in Korea, yes? Is your immigration status still legal? If so I would recommend you go immediately to the South Korean police and file a complaint against this guy.
(yes it’s written by the US Embassy, but you have the same rights in Korea as an American citizen or any other foreigner)
See also: http://www.police.go.kr/eng/index.jsp
The Foreigners’ Human Rights Protection Center located in police stations offers counseling and takes care of matters such as extortion, family abuse, overdue wages and violation of human rights, in order to protect the human rights of foreigners.
Also ask for a restraining order … a court order of protection that bans him from contact with you.
No woman deserves physical (or mental) abuse from her husband, and no woman should ever put up with it, trying to “keep a marriage together”.
This guy is no good. He has a serious behavioral problem or two and it’s unfortunate that you ever got hooked up with him.
Sadly, there are many men who come to the Philippines looking for a bride who will be meek and submissive and that they can display their power over. It’s bad. You have to be strong for yourself and your baby and end it.
Sir Dave.. here’s my question.. do i have a rights for my baby after I’m giving birth?
How sad that you have been raised up to adulthood and that you would have to ask such a question. OF COURSE you have rights. You are the child’s mother and a citizen of the Republic of the Philippines. Your child, no matter what the father may or may not do about the child’s citizenship, will for certain be a “natural born Filipino”, since you, as his.her mother already are. Born on Korean soil, born on Philippine soil, nothing can change that fact.
I would recommend that you contact one of more of the “helping agencies” here http://www.philembassy-seoul.com/filipino_community.asp
There are dozens of Filipino organizations in Korea to help Filipino workers. In addition, the Philippine Embassy has the duty to protect Philippine citizens from abuse and illegal activities, and you certainly seem to fit that category.
But sincerely, go to the police, (the Human Rights Protection Center) and go now, that’s my present advice. You must insure your personal safety and the safety of your baby before you deal with other issues.
Do i also send my baby in my place in Phil’s. then back here in Korea to work again for my baby`s future? Some friend told me that if my husband caught me that he has a right to get my baby because of a reason that I’m not a Korean citizens?
Well under the law a mother and father have equal rights to a child. So if your baby is born there in Korea it is possible the father can get a court order to keep the baby in Korea.
Of course he would have to acknowledge the child, support the child and the mother, etc. if he asked the court for this.
Form a layman’s perspective it might be best for you to go to the Philippines and have the child here. Once born, there’s very little the father can do about trying to force the child back to Korea.
But this could possibly give you problems visa-wise, etc., so you really need the help of someone who knows the labor laws and Korean immigration law.
And i don’t have enough money to raise up my child?
Well, again, this is a matter for the courts. A father must support his children and their mother by law. It isn’t always easy to force a “bad one” to do this, but you have to give the law the opportunity to work.
Do my child a Korean citizen?
You child will be a dual citizen, Korean and Filipino wherever s/he is born, provided the father acknowledges the child. Korea follows much the same rules as the Philippines, the child takes the nationality of one or both parents.
Some friend told me also that if i have a child and I’m giving birth here in Korea, will i become a Korean citizens? is it true?
Sounds like patent nonsense to me, I think you need some more reliable sources of support.
can i invite my parents here before I’m giving birth just like the others?
Not sure what you mean by “the others”. Filipinos may get visitor visas to Korea through the Korean Embassy, Makati. Sorry, other than that this question is way beyond my area of expertise.
We are not marriage here in Korea only in the Phil’s.but our papers is a original one. is it okay to giving birth in Phil’s. what will the advantage and disadvantage?
I am assuming you have an NSO marriage certificate. If so, you are married, period. Again, the police or one of the helping agencies I referred you to earlier should be able to help. The advantage I see to giving birth here in the Philippines is it will remove most of the legal hold your husband has over you and the baby.
Something else you should consider. Again, only my lay opinion, but assuming this guy is as unhappy with the marriage as you are, ask him to divorce you under Korean law. If he does this, as a Filipino, you can then file a case here in the Philippines to have the foreigner-filed divorce recognized by the Philippines, and then you’d be done with him, for good.
Just a thought.
OK, that’s all the bright ideas I have for today.
Do the one thing I recommended first, though, Seek help from the police. It is for your own safety and also for your own mental well being. You are not some second-class person because you’re a Filipino in a foreign land.
Protect yourself and stand tall. Filipino pride shouldn’t jest be about Manny and Jessica, it should be about you, yourself and your own innate worth as a human of great value.
Those who feel weak, and “meek” about themselves and their own rights as a person should read my article on “meekness” here. “Meek” does not mean what most Filipinos (or Americans for that matter) think it does.